Nights of immense boredom.

Well. It's really strange to basically feel nothing much but a vague sense of jenesaisquoi. It probably does not help that there's nothing interesting going on, or at least nothing that i would classify as interesting. Then again, it takes quite a bit to get me going when i'm in such a mood. The crappy thing is that the feeling that i-couldn't-care-less returns with increasing urgency and frequency, basically rendering me one of the worst people to hang out with ever. ugh. whatever.

i would say leave me alone, but leaving me alone invariably contributes to the illusion i have that I am the most screwed up antisocial bitch ever and I remember thinking, in my moments of sanity, that that isn't all that true. It takes a lot of convincing for me though. sigh. It's days and nights like this when I have dreams of getting really drunk, but of course, that isn't quite possible.

how depressing. the thing is, i see people around me enjoying themselves, and so it comes down to this: what's wrong with me. sigh. there are people who thrive in all sorts of conditions, and haha.

It's like a wave of cleanliness swept across my room, aided in no small part by the Military of Sg. :) my room is clean! but it's really dusty. having a construction site near my place sucks :/

Haha. So cool :) I survived my first concert proper. Without dying. But escaped with my life only barely and then again nearly without my jacket and my shawl. I now understand how people can get stampeded to death. I could easily have suffocated in the smokey barely there air! ewww. Made me miss 'my doorbell'. Damn. I didn't even catch what the first few sets were cos i was busy trying not to get killed.

But after i managed (somehow) to get out of the squish, we went round to the back where we couldn't see much but at least we could hear them :) Jack white's guitars are -so- cool. and oooher! it really rocked. sucks that it was so short tho.

White Stripes tonight! :)

It's sort of embarrassing that after a month of school, my first essay ever will only be due on Friday. I should probably (try to) make it a pretty decent one. Then again, I haven't written an essay in nearly a year. It's going to be tough :/

It freaked me out to find out that after all, I'm a pretty average kind of girl? After all my illusions of grandeur :p Sigh. And it struck me around the middle of aristotle too. How incongruent. It's just that being transplanted out of my backyard (not that i have one at home but it's just an expression of sorts) and being placed in a strange place has made me realise that I don't particularly love any -thing- crazily (except for people :) and I probably am the -worst- person ever to make small talk with (it just doesn't work). I don't know why I'm suddenly obsessed about it. But in any case. I'm insanely jealous of people who actually manage to make really good friends in university. Because it'll probably never happen here! Damn. Haha. But then again, I have puee and shafa :) who rock. So that's good :)
(always count your blessings.)

It would probably be better though if I were a more selfsufficient kind of girl. And I'm not quite :/ Not nearly as cool as Des anyhow :P

Gizmo project is SUCH A sucker for money!! they charge for connection to calls. (even tho they say they don't) ugh. and when i use skype, they don't charge me when i get the message "the customer you've called cannot be reached". and gizmo project happily guzzles my money. Yeah. Whatever.

Halloween Boat Party!
It was freaking cold. brrrr. and the music sort of degenerated into retro and techno. sigh. but other than that. quite fun! of course. i'm paying for gin and tonics with rashes. sigh.


The View


The Greenwich Thingy :) I don't remember what it's called... and it was so anticlimactic. apparently when you're on one side you're in one timezone and when you're on the other, another timezone.. but haha whatever. if people can arbitrarily decide to impose daylight savings, whether i'm in one timezone or another doesn't really matter!


Puee and me trying to look as drunk as possible. and probably succeeding, based on this photo alone. haha. assorted other drunk looking photos of me and puee around. however, must clarify here. 2 gin and tonics do not a drunk girl make.

It's so depressing. Because of daylight savings, we 'gained' one hour and now we're back on GMT I think. So it's once again 8 hours difference to Singapore. That's not the depressing part though. It's due to the fact that the sun set at 16 42h today. It was 5 in the evening and it looked like 7. :( Byebye Sun.

Victory!
I carted home a full length mirror from portobello!

i haven't done laundry in 3 weeks. and the day i choose to do my laundry, the washing machines go on strike and refuse to count down the minutes. and there's no water or anything. fing hell. grr. :(

AHHH!

according to crys i now have 12 johnny depps sitting one on top of another in my room...
(i love pueee! and well. thanks to adrian too :P i would have said 'i love adrian too!' but that sounds so wrong... heh.)

Looking thru Varian. Must they call it 'kinky tastes'?

my mind works in the strangest ways! I am probably one of -the- most susceptible people to mind influence or whatever the hell they're called. Once a possibility has been suggested, it runs about in my consciousness no end. till another suggestion comes around and knocks the previous one into oblivion! i would be a v good receptacle for subliminal (or not) messages. eeks.

hey haven't been posting! too lazy. plus i'm ill to boot and the weather here is such crap!

anyway. was in paris over the weekend.. but heh. sounds better than it was. too much to gripe about so i shan't :) parts of it was good! and i'll take it as an 'experience' as a**** would call it. :P here are the photos :)

email me darlings... i've been slow in replying but i love hearing from all of you! please email me.. don't desert me :( defenestrated@gmail.com

is there a limit to self pitying? or does it feed upon itself, growing larger and more sinister with every bite and swallow? it's possible, theoretically, to break the cycle and become happy again. but every time things look up, something happens that brings the illusions crashing down again. emotional wastelands loom :(

canterbury is quite a boring place. but fun to take 'weareveryhappy' photos in.. heh.
and the oyster gratin was so yummy!

I AM SO HUNGRY.
but i'm too lazy to step out of my room.
sigh.
hungry.
hungry.
and i can't find my snicker bar which i thought i bought.

I know rugby is a very fun sport. but when you're getting plowed into (even by the skinniest of people) it is a scary feeling! and of course it didn't help that i couldn't quite get the technique and the skinny girl i tried to bring down just dragged me along. sigh. and plus it was raining buckets. so sometimes i couldn't even see.. haha.

walking home alone after dark is so scary. Thank goodness the streets are well lit. even then, i inevitably imagine insanely free muggers waiting to pounce on me.